sometimes.
It all feels just useless. You feel like you belong nowhere, and everything feels meaningless.
Existensial crisis? I think not. However, pretty sure this was some kind of crisis.
At the moment I am just waiting for my life to start and enjoy the trip there. So to speak.
Can’t wait to feel like an adult again!
And not the ‘Grease’-kind.
I was sitting outside for 2 hours today (finally, however on the expense of going to the gym, what a shame) and I finally got my first tanlines!
I am happy in my new job now after being told that ‘the dream’ would not happen, and as it turns out, this job is pretty swell after all! Just a couple of weeks ago my whole team went to Hamburg for a 5 day training session, and next week we are going to Copenhagen for this years summer party.
Additionally, we had our offer accepted on a flat! So it’s all pretty exciting at the moment. Motivation to survive living in a house with three (soon to be four) other adults I am not even related to. Breathe in, breathe out.
So the new year came and went, and with that more stress than I have ever experienced. And I have done a Masters-degree in one year instead of two….
I was made redundant (which was more of a relief than anything else, really) 3 working days before I went on holiday to Florida (Disney! HARRY POTTER!) for two weeks, and since that my life has been a flurry of uncertainty.
We left for Florida with the perfect (!) flat, and with that one of my New Year’s goals, secured, and came back to the news of delays with the mortgage, delays with the lease extension and in the last set of news we were told that the lease extension would be too expensive for the vendor to be willing to do it. We are negotiating this at the moment, but its not looking good. So we are hanging on hopes, waiting for a definite yes or no.
I managed to find a new job. I had two interviews quite close together, and one of them for the ‘dream’-job, however the other job came back first. Now I am struggling because I have started the other job, and it’s hard to do that whole-heartedly when I know ‘the dream’ could be right around the corner, they might just be slow processing the candidates. I am doing my best trying not to think about it, but it is super hard. Now it has been a week over when they told me at the interview I would hear by, so I am thinking I might not have gotten it, but it is just hard to push it aside without a clear answer.
This shouldn’t be allowed. There should be a penalty for leaving people hanging like this. Some of us get ill, you know, because we cannot ‘just not think about it’. Easier said than done. It’s pissing me off.
Oh well. At least I am off tomorrow, so that I don’t have to feel bad for (perhaps not so) secretly checking my phone for emails or missed calls every 5 mins.
Give me strenght.
(borrowed from Supermarie, translated by me)
three words that describe me: dedicated, bubbly and caring
the first thing I do in the morning is: scroll through Instagram, Bloglovin’ and Facebook on my phone, dreading to get up
when I listen to the radio I: constantly change the radio station to find a song I can sing to (or plug my phone in instead)
I am currently looking forward to: having a boyfriend/girlfriend-weekend next weekend, having my mom over in three weeks and buying and wrapping Christmas pressies ❤ YAYYY
my wardrobe is full of: clothes, accessories and underwear. I am actually very good at getting rid of stuff I don’t wear, which causes me to almost have too few clothes. First world problem?
when I have to dress up for something: I tend to go for classy but comfy, so I can feel and look fabolous at the same time
make-up is: something that makes me feel better about myself, however I love the make-up free days
the first time I tried alcohol I was: 15 and at a really fun party with my entire class. I had two beers and was ‘soooo drunk’.
I feel sexy: after I work out (and when he looks at me THAT way)
at the coffee shop I order: black americano, chai tea latte or some sort of flavoured latte, depending on my mood
at the pub I order: red wine or cider
at a party you will find me: either trying to have a conversation with someone, wanting to go home or dancing (most likely all three at some point at any party)
by my bed I keep: fluffy slippers and a bedside table with candles and pictures of my family
I can’t live without: tasty food, good conversations and my friends/family
kids are: necessary
at night: I sleep
in my handbag I carry: hand sanitiser, hand cream, lipseal, gum, purse, iPod, umbrella
working out is: satisfying
politics is: too hard to keep up with
love is: life
this autumn I will: keep trying hard to get a job
all girls should: be happy and confident
all boys should: realise that feminism is not an ‘f-word’
I am best at: listening
I am worst at: staying confident
I just love: my life
what I want to work with: design or anything that challenges me
I admire: strong people that follow their dreams and succeed
my favourite feeling: having no specific plans, lots of snacks, sweets and nice foods, hanging out with people I love
my worst habit: always multitasking
member of: three loving families
I believe in: myself and the good in people
you might not know that I: don’t care what I do or where I am, as long as I enjoy myself, feel appreciated and experience love
at school I am: hopefully never going to find myself again
as a friend I am: trustworthy
when I have time off I: love chilling
I am passionate about: justice
in 5 years I have: a job I love in a place I like
in 10 years I am: a wife and mother
lying is OK if: it is only temporarily (i.e. about a surprise for someone) or keeps someone from feeling bad
I tried doing this quickly without too much thinking to make sure the answers were true. Hope you learnt a little bit about me!
not so ordinary 